Being a parent in today’s world is not an easy task with so much of competition between children these days. Exams of children feels like exam of parents and parents have to take care of the psychological and physical needs of their children as well as handle external pressures like social and work issues.
Every parent has 3 roles to play in a child’s life i.e.
A Teacher – Age 0 to 15
A Friend – Age 16 to 25
An Advisor – Age 25 to whenever required
These roles have to be played until the child is with you.
Role of a Teacher
• Know the child
• Learn to read face
• Speak to the child
• Keep an eye on the child
• Appreciate the child
• Explain the child
• Enable the mental growth of the child
When a child is growing up and moving through his/her school life, it is important to develop the child as much as possible as it lays the foundation for his/her life.
Role of a Friend
• Talk like a teenager
• Listen as much as possible
• Try to know their friends
• Never criticize them
• Keep a track of their habits
• Go outing with them when possible
• Assign them tasks which can develop their life skills
A parent’s biggest test starts when the child reaches the age of 16, an age of experimentation and friendships. The child is exposed a lot more to the external world and learns to strike a balance between friends and family. Friends tend to take more time and energy so ensuring you giving themample time when asked for and family outings should be given priority.
Role of an Advisor
• Be Available
• Give advice when asked for
• Agree to their point of view before giving feedback
• Accept some decisions they take
• Be flexible
• Have your own group in place
• Save for your future
About this age the children tend to get married or will get married. This is the time when a new member joins the family with new ideas and new expectations in the mind. It is important to be a good observer and learn to make early adjustments and be more of an advisor to avoid conflicts in your parenting role.
Some key things that can give you an edge in Parenting
• Being a good Face/Expressions Reader: Being a good face/expressions reader can work wonders in your parenting role. Children are too expressive; they would rather express than speak up so be good at reading them and understanding their unspoken words.
• Appreciate Them: Everyone needs love an appreciation, so if you can appreciate your child
no matter what their age, they will always be willing to share everything whether the good or bad which will enable you to guide them.
• Explain the Child: You have to explain the child why you would not want them to do a particular thing or develop a particular habit. They are just curious to experiment but if explained well with examples then they may not do things which are not right for them.
• Be a good Listener:
Being a good listener is essential for parenting because a parent who
listens to their child well can do a lot of things when required. It’s good to sometimeswithout wanting to give an advice/feedback because the need of the child is for someone to understand him/her at that moment.
• Never Criticise them
Criticizing your child for something can instantly take your child away
from you and make friends outside his moral support. If the child has done something wrong then first accept him/her the way they are and then explain them how things wrongly done can impact them and their immediate family members. Mostly they will accept the fault and be careful henceforth.
• Go Outing with them:
Building a bond with your child can be difficult with busy schedules the parent and the child follows with various activities, classes, studies, etc. Going outing
and doing some joint activities allows you to connect with them on a one to one basis and improve the love and affection between the child and the family.
• Be Available:
Being available is a thing that only a parent can do these days. Parents have a
lot of love for their children so being available always comes natural to them. However be available when the child is in need and the other times should be used to recharge your own energies to be able to be available again.
• Agree to their point of view:
Agreeing to what they say is important these days as children
are exposed to technology and a lot of knowledge which empowers them to take decisions. You should agree that their decisions could be good but if you were in their place then you would have done that. This makes them feel accepted as well as they may consider your advice.
• Be Flexible:
When you have to stay with children in older age, it’s nice to be flexible with
their schedules as it will lead to less stress. If you would be flexible with them then even they would be flexible with you at least in some cases which comfort you. You have to allow them to take the lead.
All these things are easy to follow but if you have a guide who can help you put these into action effectively then you can definitely use them. Therappo’s Online Counselling with experts can help. You can also understand how other parents use these methods. Online Counselling is done by professionals who deal with parents on an ongoing basis and guide them towards successful parenting.